i am unknowing


June 06, 2022

Well I’ve gone down a bit of a rabbit hole with this old Christian heresy called gnosticism. Truthfully the only reason I’m interested in it is because my favorite artist of all time, Bladee, is reportedly interested in it. Hearing how his music has progressed over time has had me interested in his psyche for awhile, and this is perhaps a small window into his mind.

My understanding of Gnosticism is that it’s wasn’t actually an “ism”. Instead it was a collection of numerous sects that were popularized in the 2nd century. There isn’t a specific literary work that you can read to understand what “they” believed because the religion doesn’t prescribe to rigid beliefs.

Throughout the various sects there are some main clichés that are of note. The primary one being that they feel the material world is evil and that the spiritual world is the real world. The material world was created by a demiurge who is lesser than human. The demiurge is the antagonist to all that is purely spiritual.

There is also an unkowable God or Supreme Being that is the creator of everything. The demiurge created the material world which brought about and created evil…I think.

Gnostics believe that the way to enlightenment is through knowledge instead of through orthodox teachings and authority found in other religions.

I am not quite sure where I’m currently at spiritually. I grew up in a Christian household and went to church most Sundays when I was younger. I absolutely hated it, but am very glad to have that foundation for morals and values now that I’m older. It’s easy for me to see the impact it had on me vs. people I know who did not grow up going to church.

I have a very hard time believing the theories around how the universe was created. The theory of evolution makes sense, but the things before that are very difficult for me to reason about.

The simulation theory is interesting, and perhaps ties in to some of the gnostic beliefs. If this world doesn’t actually exist, then the true world is something else. Perhaps this material world was created by some demiurge with the unknowable God elsewhere and that is what we’re calling the simulation.

The logical side of my brain tells me to not worry about this stuff because it’s all theorized pretty rigorously by scientists. The other side of my brain is saying that no, your “logic” is just a manufacture of thought that makes sense in this world. Disregard it and think beyond your logical confines.

I’ll probably write more about this. It’s fascinating to think about.

I'm Carl and I'm just gonna write about my life

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